This is perfect timing, I am in the midst of a conflict
between one of my teachers and a parent. I am taking the “third side”. The
parent does not want to leave her 4 year old with us if she is crying; she has
brought her child to the bus with great success of a quick kiss goodbye. One
day this parent flagged the bus down as it was pulling away to get her daughter
on. One of the teachers went to help the child on who started to cry. The
mother was talking to the teacher wavering back and forth as 30 kids were
waiting on the bus. The teacher was frustrated, the parent was frustrated and
the child hasn’t been at summer camp since (one week).
The first strategy is empathetic listening to each
individual involved. I will check back with each one to make sure I accurately
understand their perspective. With empathetic seeing, listening and speaking I
hope to make the parent comfortable in what ever her decision and support the
teacher in respecting the parents parenting style.
The second strategy is to have a meeting with the parent and
teacher so we are clear on how the family culture works. And explain our school
culture and how it works in a group situation. All the while having the utmost
respect for the family culture with open and honest communication.
This is an interesting explanation of empathy by Alan Seid. http://www.cnvc.org/how-do-empathy
That is a difficult situation and I believe meeting with each person separately and then together would be a good idea. It is necessary to consider the culture that would also help in solving this dilemma. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteTina
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you have a conflict that is known all to well, which is differing views about child rearing. The teachers want the child to come even though she may be crying while the parent has different views in regards to how one should respond to a crying child. The third side is a good strategy to implore. I hope all goes well as you utilize your new strategy.
Sounds as if you have a good handle on ways to help this conflict reach a solution. Working with families can be challenging. I think one of the main things to remember is that we are asking families to trust us with the most important thing in their lives, their child. What an immense responsibility we are taking on. A huge amount of trust is being placed in our hands and we must do all we can to earn that trust and help these families to understand that we want their children to be as successful as they do. Good luck in handling this conflict!!
ReplyDeleteHeather
This is definitely a difficult situation, my opinion is to meet with both sides individually. I think you have a handle on the situation and best of luck.
ReplyDelete